"God shows us our poverty of Spirit when we try, in our own strength, to walk in a way pleasing to God...and yet continually fail" (Praying God's Word by Beth Moore, 63).
I have had a large lesson in humility over the past week. It started with some small complications in this pregnancy. My pride in being "healthy" was stripped away. I assumed that by eating clean, organic, whole food and exercising, that I would have as many healthy, problem-free pregnancies as I desired. God's ways are not my ways. Our baby seems to be perfectly normal, but for a few days, we were not sure, and I had an opportunity to fully lean on and trust my Father.
Then, my husband returned home after a nourishing Bible conference in Florida. We missed each other while he was gone, especially due to the fact that we had the minor pregnancy emergency while he was across the country. But he came back, I was fine, and I began to be irritable and contentious once again. And we know what Scripture says about a contentious woman.
My husband is blessed with a unique ability to commandingly yet lovingly address my sin, but my pride usually blocks me from seeing his loving intentions. So I ignore him, continue in my inward bitterness, and hope it will all go away. But that is not God's way, either.
In our small group study this week and again in my personal Bible study, God taught me that humility is vital to sanctification. I know this, I just conveniently forget it when my desires are not met. Paul Tripp, who writes the study, says that desires are not independently wrong. When my desires begin to negatively affect my relationships, I am decidedly in sin.
My personal study on pride led me to the quote this post opened with. I am reminded, so many times throughout my days and years, that is futility to attempt to sanctify myself. God only desires a broken and contrite heart.