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Tuesday, August 4, 2009

Professions

This morning, my husband engaged me in a discussion about my job. He can see when I am starting to feel overwhelmed by things in my life. He is constantly helping me to see where I need to readjust and rethink.

"Sometimes, you just have to say, 'Oh, well'", he said.

I knew exactly what he meant.

The portobello mushrooms are burning in oil and smoke is filling the house two minutes before the new dinner guests are due. Oh, well.

All 72 blocks are strewn about a freshly vacuumed room and spankings must precede a full clean-up. Oh, well.

The cat jumps up on the counter for the fifteenth time and knocks a dish off of the counter, breaking it and spilling pasta sauce on the newly cleaned floor. Oh, well.

It is hot and I am pregnant and anxious about the future and the children are screaming over the last mandarin wedge. Oh, well.

Now, his point was not that these things matter for naught. They are part of the day, notable of their own right. I am to rely on the Lord for guidance and strength. His point was that these things happen throughout everyday to everyone. I have been using life as an excuse to have a poor attitude, actually believing that these minor events are purposefully done against me by children, husband, and cat. I have been believing the lie that I have the right to get bitter, angry, and self-righteous if everything does not go my way. Ah, the deceitfulness of sin. I sin under the guise of believing that I can be perfect, and a perfect person must have perfect surroundings. Ha! Sigh...silly, wretched girl that I am!

It truly takes a half-hour of adult conversation (timed well by my husband) to see where my error lies. He got me fresh out of bed and I was able to more humbly that usual accept his gentle correction. A cushy environment, little stress, angelic children, and a constantly doting husband do not make me more Christlike. Those things definitely do not make me a better mother or wife. My profession is to care for my family. As Beau pointed out, a good employee must vigilantly plan, organize, and strive for constant progress toward the better. It is not enough to haphazardly throw a day together and expect that things will go well. I certainly set myself up to have a bad attitude.

However, there are also things that must simply be overlooked emotionally. No one in my family is out to get me. No one is intentionally trying to upset me. Accidents, poops, cries, spills, and burnt dinners just happen and can't be an excuse every day for me to play the martyr. Now that I can see more clearly that these are the ugly lies I believe deep in my heart, I can methodically begin to take these thoughts captive and respond differently than the sulk that tends to creep out from me.

"Oh, well." God is in control of my day. I am not in control of my day. I can glorify Him or psuh my family away. I choose life!

2 comments:

Suzanne@NotesfromthePatch said...

When I see Jennifer I see a beautiful woman inside and out. God's love radiates from you and I don't know the woman you write about here. I see a talented, beautiful, patient young mother glorifying God and making me wanting to be a better person. Please don't forget to see all the good you do for your family and those around you. And remember too that you are a hormonal pregnant woman with two small children. I, for one, think you are just wonderful!

Jennifer said...

Thank you, Suzanne, for your sweet words of encouragement. I use this blog as somewhat of a journal on my walk with the Lord, what I am learning and how He is teaching me. Maybe I am too transparent! I hope to look back as I grow and see the journey of sanctification that God has guided me on. You are more dear to me than you know and I am quite thankful that we can grow our friendship in the store and via our blogs!

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